Lust

Limitlessly likeable, lyrically lymphatic,

empirically emphatic,

Lust.

Life lived through the loins,

behavior symptomatic of blood dripping from the groin,

leaving the body into a shipwreck but looking at you and still awe-ing,

Lust.

 

You    make    me    go    bust,

Until you saw your schedule and saw you’re busy again,

which makes me want to cuss- Fuck.

Fuck you, fuck me, Fuck me, FUCK ME, fucking you is fucking with me, fuckidy fuck FUCK.

 

Fuming with desire and i grasp for air,

Trying to avoid you or stay near, but you don’t care.

When I’m around you there is nothing i want to bare,

but you,

Y.O.U – YOU,

Give me your disdained spew,

Making me crawl near until the line you drew,

Observing how I don’t love but just want to be IN and around you.

 

Hypnotized by your fragrance and captivated by your smile,

You make me howl like I was Ovid’s wild child,

Like i want to be captured and trained by you,

Waiting to be used and screaming “Pi-ka-chu”

Serving you as a slave,

one of the people from Django Unchained.

Ready to be punished

but only in a way from 50 shades of grey.

 

Pop, pop, stop,on,

These moments have to be gone,

I’m not a switch but you have to stop turning me on,

You would miss me but darling I don’t intend to be gone.

 

We are finally going to enter  this duel,

For too long you have thought of me a fool,

making long faces and keeping me close enough to make me drool,

Making me your emotional support like I’m your base, your fucking stool,

I’m not your fan, here just to make you feel cool.

 

It’s time i leave now and i think i’m done here,

I have spent a lot of time but don’t see a future dear,

Goodbye, i have to leave now as i leave everything in the clear,

but look behind because despite everything I’ll always come crawling back to you,

cry me a river.

 

 

The 6 Deadly Sins of “Women Empowerment” in India

10 Minute Read

In the last few years the concept of “Women Empowerment” has been thrown around considerably; whether in politicians’ speeches or citizens’ rallies. India, along with the vast majority of countries, is far from set goals of women empowerment while the common perception of gender equality being close, remains. This is partly due to misunderstandings, bad decisions and an important fallacy in our pursuit of said equality. Listed below are some of those:

1.The meaning of “empowerment”

Empowerment, by almost every definition, means “to allow to take control”. This implies that by using the word empower we are not accepting women’s birthrights but, by “empowering” them, are merely allowing them. We, and by we I mean everybody on this earth, do not hold the, almost godly, privilege of controlling peoples’ rights and neither we. There are clearly many human rights violations which happen to women, like domestic violence and many others, but do not “empower” women. Fight for their right, make them aware of their rights but do not place yourself on a pedestal by calling it empowerment. This may be called a small problem as one may say people have the best intentions when they call for “empowerment” but the word is merely a representation of the mindset India has adopted to tackle the issue.

 2.Effects on Men

Whether it was intentional or not, prevalence of male bashing or similar mindsets is undeniable, with most publications gender bashing rather than criminal bashing. For example, the Vogue #StartWithTheBoys seems to bash an entire gender and accuse them of being criminals. This issue does not appear on the surface but is exists just below. This mindset also brings about the idea that men are never the victims, and thus make waste of several issues which unfold before men. For Example: Domestic Violence against men has not one documented case since it is not recognized by our law *. India has several cases and if compared with the rest of the world as a potential number, The Guardian reports 40% of domestic violence cases are registered acts of violence against men. Be it not always initiated by women, men stay in a state of denial and are mocked whenever they reach out. Even if they do eventually report the incident, no cases are made. Men need to understand that they too can be victims and should not be blamed as a gender, but if guilty, as individuals.

* “The Protection of women from domestic violence act, 2005” is the only domestic violence act in India and does not apply to Men.

3. Start Young

Focus should be to make gender a non-taboo and encouraged discussion at home and at school. Gender perceptions, or the understanding of the characteristics of the gender, are shaped largely at school and separating boys and girls during classes and making or encouraging them play different sports definitely doesn’t help. At home the classic stereotypes of girls like dolls and boys like cars, like blue and pink, run rampant as we only continue to escalate the already ridiculously polar perceptions of what is masculine and feminine. We cannot expect an individual decision if every outlet, media or people, tells boys they prefer cars to dolls. Before children realize there are more options, they are already hooked onto the toys and lifestyle, interest, and choices. We need to stray away from gender stereotypes by disrupting our own flawed perception of them and eradicating them at a grass-root level. We should give birth to individuals, not physical manifestations of gender stereotyping.

 4.Ineffective Policies

Policies to “empower” women have also been beyond abysmal. There have been implementations (Like the Domestic Violence Helpline) which never work because they cater to an entire state on 1 device and call it a “helpline”. While in some cases they don’t work, in the others their working is worse than not. For Example: The bus rule of having a women only seat center. In an overcrowded bus, seats can and are often left empty because of this rule, making it an example of overcompensating in a way that does not make sense. Policies have failed in their intentions and sometimes lead to bigger problems; sometimes even the best intentions don’t bring about the best if they aren’t thought through enough.

5.The Oppression Olympics

We are living in the midst of “Oppression Olympics”. I use this term to describe how by bashing other genders or showing biases, we rank our gender higher only to realize that the movement is downward or at best lateral. There is no growth by competition on this issue and the sooner we realize that empowering individuals regardless of gender, sex, race and sexuality is the only upward movement, will we ever achieve our goals of gender equality. I know that this is not an easy, possibly impossible, task but just the realization is a big step. Move beyond the men or women or transgender or people of any gender get it better and move towards a harmonious victory and make our lives get better. If there lacks a basic amenity or right for a gender, let’s contest that and get out of this oppression.

6.The Big Picture

A world where people of all genders suffer equally is not an “empowered” world. We must tackle specific problems, make gender neutral laws and start breaking gender stereotypes. We must keep this big picture in our mind at all times. We must ingrain the big picture into our brains and our five senses. It must be embedded so deep that it hangs at the tip of everybody’s’ tongue, at the back of everybody’s mind; until it screams from the buried ashes of everybody’s’ actions, for we must live in a world of gender equality, something people of every gender should definitely agree upon.

An Open Letter

8 Minute Read

To whomever it may concern (Just about everybody),

No one exists without prejudice and this prejudice often takes the form, on a rudimentary level, of a stereotype. Stereotypes are thoughts or ideas we have about a specific group of people. Why am i telling you this? Because of the common yet brutal misconceptions we have because of these stereotypes. “Mard ko dard nahi hota” (“Men don’t feel pain”), the line echoed across cinema theaters as the masses cheered. Not much has changed from then; the dialogues become slogans, then anthems, then generalizations and finally “the truth”.

More recently, these notions are beginning to be challenged. Always, a company that makes sanitary pads, released a video titled “#LikeAGirl” which shows how older people would act flimsier or more delicate if asked to do an action like a girl, while younger people, possible unaware of this generalization, acted enthusiastically. It is not that any gender is weak, it is simply the way we have always presented them. If we want to have any hope of pursuing gender equality we need to deconstruct all stereotypes.

Vogue recently released a video #StartWithTheBoys which shows how the constant hearing of “men don’t cry” makes a man  inflict domestic violence. Although this video brilliantly showcases how people suffer from the above mentioned stereotypes, it has a few flaws. In the video they went about with the man’s story and did not have to link it to women domestic violence. It oversimplifies the issue of domestic violence and also builds on the stereotype that only men are only causers of domestic violence while subsequently blaming the entire sex, which helps in no way. There is more than enough evidence against the claim; a survey by The Guardian revealed that domestic violence cases constitute of 40% against men. I cannot quote data in India because “Mard ko dard nahi hota” . We do not believe these cases happen and if they do we suppress them because of possible embarrassment.

If you think that i am picking out specific points and that another gender is actually more oppressed, you exemplify my point. “If i suffer but suffer less then you, i do not suffer” is not a justifiable thought. Please go beyond this “Oppression Olympics” we have created and join hands to solve each problem by giving it the attention it needs. Next time your son wants a pink bag, please do not tell him it is “feminine”. If your daughter wants to become a footballer when she grows up, please do not tell her to think of something less “masculine”. We are living in the world of these stereotypes but please make sure they get broken down now so the next generation doesn’t have to live with it. Be vigilant in your pursuit to not be defined by your gender, sex or sexuality and make sure you pick up people along your journey. Challenge gender norms and gender identities. It is not easy, it is not an obligation. It is your right.

A riled up human.

Pic credits to Lynda Carter

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A Psuedo-Blog ?

As i write this, a series of question run across my mind: “Am i really writing a blog?” , “Am i going to regularly publish posts?”, “Is anyone outside my social circle even going to read this?”. I write to you, my dear reader, a series of reflections, musings, and stories. Some intend to raise awareness, some intended to lighten your mood, some up for interpretation.

The purpose of this blog is to express my opinions, thoughts, and beliefs. The aim is not to be regular or post for the sake of posting. If this would frustrate you as a reader, i suggest clicking away. If you like the content and wouldn’t mind the schedule, please read on.